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Unless for some odd reason your bestie is 100 percent OK with it, even considering her ex automatically qualifies you as a bad friend. I love my friends, but sharing the same sex partner as them just doesn't strike me as a turn on. You've heard every terrible thing that they did to your best friend. That goes without saying, but since some seem to forget this, it bears repeating.Sometimes it seems like the universe just likes to laugh at your life.That's certainly the case when you find yourself attracted to your ex's friend!But don’t fool yourself into thinking there isn’t more at stake here than just asking out the friend of a friend.All you’ve said about your ex’s friend is that you find her attractive and you’re interested. Said ex probably likes people who share similar qualities (mountain biking! ) and you guys have probably all pal-ed around together for months, maybe even years; it makes that you might be attracted to ex's friend. For all you know, your ex just wasn't that into it and might be stoked to see you move on to someone who's better suited for you. Accusations and tears may flow as freely as the alcohol that you're likely consuming. Don't self loathe, wallow or spiral into misery, that's not gonna make anyone's pain go away and it sure as hell isn't going to pave a smooth foundation for your new love-fest. If I break up with someone — and I have broken up and been broken up with a lot — I have no problem with any of my friends dating my ex, falling in love with her and even marrying her. Unless you're a terrible person, you probably don't want to trample your ex's heart in the process of nurturing your new flame. And, guess what, your new squeeze—who just might be a nice person! As noted journalist Mary Schmich once said, "don't be reckless with other people's hearts." There's no need to punch an innocent bystander in their tender bits because you've gotten burned or are pining for someone else. If you were the one who got dumped however, we think you have a little more leverage in pursuing your ex's pal; after all s/he didn't want you anymore, right? I don’t care if it’s a casual acquaintance, I don’t care if it’s your best friend in the whole world, and I don’t care who broke up with whom.

(Because you're fabulous and amazing, it probably is though.) Also important to assess: who broke up with who?Often it’s hard to tell the two apart, especially if you’ve not been in a relationship or hooked up with anyone in a while.If you can distinguish between the two and it’s nothing more than an urge for a wild boot-knocking, then stop right there because it’s definitely not worth it.Just because they did it in Friends, it doesn’t mean it’s OK in real life, guys.Where relationships are concerned, going out with one of your mates’ ex partners is, whichever way you look at it, wrong.




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