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Q: You don't like the concept of relationships as "work," so why "hard" questions? “Still, it’s worth acknowledging such differences if they exist.”]11. Because butterflies and sweaty palms aren't really romance. The honeymoon can last five days or five years, but at some point the heat and hormones subside. She talks with us about her eye-opening exercise for anyone who has made a commitment — and is committed to making it last. (In dollars, or otherwise.) Is each person’s contribution acceptable to the other? Here's how the conversation went: Q: Does romance really have to die? I've tried to think of a softer way to say that, but all I come up with are new-age platitudes. The hard questions first occurred to me when I was thinking about getting married. Most of the couples I knew were either getting a divorce or, even worse, in some kind of lifeless relationship. Sure, I loved my boyfriend, but all these other people were in love when they got married, too. I realized that none of my past relationships ended due to lack of love — they ended because one of us (OK, me) didn't love our life together.

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As I stand on a terrace dotted with flat-screen TVs, watching a beautiful couple making out in a swimming pool below, I have a revelation about why the Cross-Country Love Crowdtilt met its fund-raising goal: For every tech guy struggling to find love in San Francisco, there is one struggling harder to find novel ways to spend his money.

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