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What you want is , you want the people whom you’re hoping to date… The very first thing that people look at when they get your message in their inbox and are trying to decide whether or not they’re intrigued enough to write back is your profile photo in the thumbnail. ladies” shirtless photos; all it does is make women think of The Jersey Shore – and not in a good way.so you have to know how they think, what they’re looking for and, critically, how to grab them by the eyeballs. Your profile – your screen name, your photos, your vital statistics and your words – are your packaging and even slight flaws can make potential customers (dates) go off in search of products that strike them as more appealing. If you don’t snag those eyeballs right from the get-go, you’ve already lost them. You need your first photo to be one that impresses. Just your smiling face, possibly with a splash of color somewhere to help stand out from the other sea of photos. If you don’t have enough imagination to figure out how to get a photo from your time at the beach or waterpark to show that you’ve got more cuts than Tiesto then you really shouldn’t be worried about online dating in the first place.You see people checking out your profile and disappearing into the digital ether and the people you The problem however, is that often you’re focusing on the wrong areas.There’s no profit in expending valuable time and brain-cycles on the people who aren’t responding to you. Treating online dating like an exercise in commerce and marketing can seem antithetical to the process of trying to find a date, a sex partner, or a long-term relationship.Women just have to click “Looking for: Casual Sex” and they will be bombarded with more attention than they know what to do with.

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You need to direct your attention to where it does the most good: the people who are already checking you out. After all, dating is all about putting your best, most authentic self forward and we associate marketing with an attractive line of bullshit that’s intended to lure in a bunch of suckers eager to be separated from their hard-earned money.

Your messages can be awesome, but unless you have a profile that makes them stop and pay attention… So I’m about to impart to you the secret to online dating success: you need to quit thinking like a lover. Worse, when you bring “marketing” and “internet” together, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? You want as many people as possible coming to see your profile and you want to keep those people around long enough to dazzle them with your brilliance (or at least baffle them with your bullshit) and make them decide that yes, they attention, the kind you don’t want.

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